Overwhelmed, Underpaid and Overworked
I learned about the Lawyers’ Assistance Program (LAP) by reading this column. In February of 1988, I needed a confidential listener and counselor. Like many of us, I had begun to feel overwhelmed, underpaid and overworked. These feelings invariably fed a sense of depression that I’d somehow learned to carry around. At any rate, just over a year ago, I took a chance: I called LAP from a pay phone, safely away from home or office. (Throughout the next several months the LAP staff showed every concern for strict confidentiality.)
The impetus for contacting LAP was the problems common to so many of us: the constant demands of a multiplicity of complex cases, long hours and high risk for what seemed like low pay. I had a decreasing interest in recreational activities and home life. I was no longer a new or young attorney. The satisfaction of being able to perform professionally with a degree of confidence and experience no longer made up for the stress. The thought of spending the next 20 or so years in such servitude was not pleasant. And, in all honesty, I never thought of myself as the lawyer type anyway. I put out good work, but the psychological price was always exacting.
I was put in touch with one of the LAP professional counselors. A twice-a-month, hour-long consultation was arranged at the LAP office. The counselors, who specialize in working with lawyers, have developed an approach that takes into account both the strengths and vulnerabilities of practicing attorneys. It involves harnessing those talents sharpened by the practice of law (they enabled me to survive law school in the first place) in the recovery effort. In my case, we explored means of assuming responsibility for control over my life, i.e., moves into different areas of practice, whittling down my caseload, referring difficult clients, obtaining adequate compensation. I suppose it should have been obvious, but I was amazed at how much brighter the world looked after I began to decrease stress through these changes.
The art of relaxation probably comes naturally to few lawyers. It never has to me; I had to learn it, almost from scratch. Like any newly-acquired skill, this one needs constant reinforcement. It’s easy to allow a caseload once under control to slip out of hand; it’s easy to get locked into the old habit of not having time to enjoy life or to take time off. We developed various "exit strategies" to offset the effects of old habits.
LAP’s efforts on my behalf were creative as well as professional. The counselor provided information about inexpensive light therapy that, research suggests, helps relieve winder depression ("seasonal affective disorder"). It helped my state of mind a great deal and produced a change in an unproductive sleep pattern.
As I mentioned previously, the sessions were conducted at the LAP office within the Bar Association office: LAP is in an isolated corner, so confidentiality is assured even during regular work hours. (The counselor saw me early in the evening after work.)
Members who are familiar with how their dues are spent (for spot audits, disciplinary actions, complaints against attorney procedures, etc.) should be pleased to learn that LAP is a strictly confidential program specifically designed to lighten the load of the individual attorney. It is a service designed to meet just the needs of its clients: lawyers.
Note
Chronic stress will lead to exhaustion and the development of distress symptoms. Lawyers reporting a wide range of distress symptoms (e.g. clinical depression, eating disorders, chronic procrastination, alcoholism, anxiety attacks, anger problems, etc.) have sought LAP’s assistance. They have reduced, and are reducing, their distress while ending their isolation. If you or someone you know has a need, please call us at (206) 727-8268.
Originally published in the Washington State Bar News, July 1989.
